Candidacy

In terms of academics, one thing has weighed heavily on me all summer: the candidacy exam. The purpose of the candidacy exam is to demonstrate that a student is sufficiently proficient in their subject area that they are qualified to add knowledge to the field. For many students pursuing a PhD this is the turning point from taking a full-time course-load to primarily focusing on research for their dissertation.

I had been warned in late April that I would be taking the exam soon. After differences in schedules among faculty members I finally received my dates in early July. Of course, the dates framed my planned great vacation. For my department the candidacy exam comes in three parts: a written essay to demonstrate English proficiency, a technical written exam, and an oral presentation.

My primary concern was the technical written exam. I’m a native English speaker and an experienced public speaker. So long as I did not allow myself to make any foolish mistakes, I felt confident in my performance. The technical written exam, well, that’s a completely different animal. It is nine hours answering some tough questions from four basic subject areas within transportation.

Thankfully, the essay and technical exam were before my vacation. But the oral presentation and the question and answer period on the technical exam came after my vacation. No matter what we did on our vacation, I was mentally going through every single thing I did on the technical exam to try and find faults, so I could share them with the faculty panel, explain the mistake, and beg them not to end my academic career. In retrospect, I was being just a little bit dramatic.

Two days after returning from my vacation I stood before the panel and gave my presentation. I chose to make minor modifications to a presentation I had previously given on the roundabouts in Fairmont, WV. Then, I had to respond to questions about the technical portion of the exam. The intention is simply to determine if a student sufficiently understands the fundamentals of the field, transportation engineering. Of course, regardless of your preparation it feels like you’re being ambushed. The first question in particular threw me for a loop, requiring me to remember basics from courses I took several years ago. While the faculty attempted to help me, I was getting more confused and froze up before the white board. I thought I was doomed. As I continued to answer questions I thought it was worthless because I bombed the first question.

When it was finished, I sat out in the hall certain that the verdict was that I failed.

After what seemed like an eternity, my advisor came out into the hallway with a smile on his face. He shook my hand and said that I passed.

I have a reputation for being tough, but once I was out of ear and eye shot of the faculty panel, I was fighting back the tears.

When I started college, I never imagined I’d be here. I had no plans for a PhD, let alone a PhD in engineering. I was ready to enter college early so I wanted to kill time before becoming a railroad conductor. But now that I’m here and a doctoral candidate, I can’t imagine doing anything else.